I thought this was pretty funny; so although I do not think I will ever get married, I had a really cute dream.
It was just me and him, standing face to face and you would think I would be crying already but I had this I'm so in love with you smile on my face and he had this one tear in his left eye that was going to drop at any moment. We weren't able to see each other the night before, of course and it was my bright idea to actually make it three days before, just in case he had second thoughts, he had time to figure those thoughts out and normally if we spend even a an entire day in silence the sex, once we started speaking or saw each other, which ever came first, was always the best sex. The way he makes me feel when we are being intimate.... but I digress. The day was perfect, you could feel the love through the slight breeze and the glowing of the sun. He was standing there with a slight smirk on his face, like, yea that's my baby in front of me. He is so freaking sexy when he smirks, he has this crease that forms on the side of his face, its not a dimple though; its just sexiness. He had on a black tux, no tie, the collars of his collared shirt were so crisp, just like I like it, with a few buttons at the top unbuttoned. His shirt was tucked in a straight leg trouser that fell just passed his ankles but didn't touch the ground. Of course he didn't wear dress shoes, he hates dress shoes. He would have wore some Jordan's but I convinced him to wear some all black chuck tailors, which he also hates. Surly he took those off before the reception. His hair was cut perfectly low and he had shaved down his beard, ugh, he is so sexy when he cleans up and his eyes, shaped like almonds, were beautiful. My hair was super long and wavy but was pinned up perfectly enough to see the spirals a waves with the red tint of my hair reflecting through the sunlight and the brown in my eyes as I glared into my soon to be husbands eyes. My face was freshly painted with a glowing finish; very natural with a light pink blush and a nude/pink gloss. He really loves when I am natural. My dress was a pearl haltered dress that sat above my knees. It was tight at the top and my bosoms looked perfect and once the top of my dress reached my waist, I puffed out. I wasn't a huge puff but a perfect feathered fluff. I wore a pearl colored, 4 inch, sling back Steve Madden pump with a semi squared front. I accessorized with medium diamond studs and a diamond tennis bracelet he purchased for me on my 30th birthday when we finally decided to commit to each other completely, leaving my neck line bare and open.
So in the dream we got to the Vow part and you must know that him and I are goofy and retarded and truth be told we have been plotting on ways to kill each other since day one. Although, it seems that so far it hasn't worked out that way, we will probably be the death of each other; however, at this present moment it is neither here nor there. So I guess I should keep the story going.
So I said, I vow to love you through good health, your glorious poops and your hideous farts. I vow to rub your back when you snore because then you will stop but only for a moment. I vow to be your supporter with all that you do and laugh at all of your jokes even when they suck. I vow not to intentionally lie or cheat but I do realize that we are human; doesn't mean go for it. I vow not leave you for any reason unless I decide to leave you in the living room because you are in the dog house, I am just saying; realistic vows here. I vow to be your backbone, your lover, your friend and your partner. I vow to love you as I love myself ... I vow to share my dreams & secrets with you. I vow to share my life with you, you Jerk! I loved you then, I love you now and I will love you always.
But of course he always finds a way to get out of mushy, the next form of noise was my phone ringing the I am in trouble ring tone, it was him calling, waking me out of my sleep; he was saved by the bell...
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Added Perks
Happy is a feeling or showing pleasure or contentment. Having a sense of confidence in or satisfaction with a person, arrangement or situation.That is a defined definition of happy right?
But happiness is merely what you make of it, don't you think?? Its like in school, when you start a class everyone starts with an A and throughout the semester, your grade can change based on what effort you have put forth in school. We are not perfect at all, so we wont always get an A right, luckily there are different classes and every time you start out with an A. Like a do over or fresh start. And in life we are constantly finding ways to be better or not! However, just like classes there are new days and for everything you didn't do yesterday, you can start fresh on today. Although people may not think that way, I think it is true. In anything there is work but once you have gotten there you just have to make sure you can stay there.
So lets talk about Happy. In order to reach that goal you must be happy with yourself; that's it. Simple right? Not really, emotions are hard on people, people are hard on people, situations are hard on people. My man makes me happy, when he makes me laugh, when we talk, when he kisses my forehead; when he tells me I am beautiful and especially when I hear him say he loves me but he has to say it all weird because its weird to him. Then again, we have a pretty awesome relationship. we communicate well, we are friends, partners, lovers; we just work well together. We have never really had a real argument. well at least not one that has made me react or not even make me want to look at him. He has never really hurt me to the point where I wanted to leave and had no thought behind it until recently. He said to me the other day 'I hope that you can be happy again and my response was I just hope that you could be Happy." Lets not forget that the goal first is, self. Thing is I am happy period and he is my perk, my greatest perk and although I was hurt, I was not unhappy; I am not unhappy. All I could think of was the way he makes me feel and that we are all human and that I wish he was Happy; I wish he knew what my heart feels like and how much more of a good emotion is in it because of him, but again he is my perk. I remember once, he said I am happy and I could feel his smile through the phone, he said it without a thought; it was beautiful, my entire heart lit up. I love that man so. In the beginning of this I said, "In anything you strive to reach there is work but once you have gotten there you just have to make sure you can stay there." It seems and I have learned, that we allow people, situations, emotions and money dictate our happy. How we feel about our self because lets face it, happy is all about self love. If you are always smiling with yourself then nothing else can really come through and break that; no matter how good or bad. So what do we do?? Who ever really knows and I truly don't have an answer for that other than to search for your happy. How you do it? I have no idea but if we all would make ourselves priority first then you can add people, situations or whatever into the equation. We have to always know that we are the prize and everything else is a perk. I can say I have lost myself, my happy in people plenty of times and I almost lost myself in the man. I didn't want to lose sight of me, I just wanted to have sight of us. A relationship is the easiest was anyone can lose any and everything, I became selfless at one point and in turn it allowed him to be selfish, that is when I realized I almost lost my happy. We have to realize that relationships are about two people everything matters on both ends. Easier said than done but teams of two work well with both teammates work together and work with one another, not one or the other. Happy is love; love yourself and then you can learn to love someone else... everything else is the added perk.; Don't need it, want it. Never forget yourself and just be happy.
But happiness is merely what you make of it, don't you think?? Its like in school, when you start a class everyone starts with an A and throughout the semester, your grade can change based on what effort you have put forth in school. We are not perfect at all, so we wont always get an A right, luckily there are different classes and every time you start out with an A. Like a do over or fresh start. And in life we are constantly finding ways to be better or not! However, just like classes there are new days and for everything you didn't do yesterday, you can start fresh on today. Although people may not think that way, I think it is true. In anything there is work but once you have gotten there you just have to make sure you can stay there.
So lets talk about Happy. In order to reach that goal you must be happy with yourself; that's it. Simple right? Not really, emotions are hard on people, people are hard on people, situations are hard on people. My man makes me happy, when he makes me laugh, when we talk, when he kisses my forehead; when he tells me I am beautiful and especially when I hear him say he loves me but he has to say it all weird because its weird to him. Then again, we have a pretty awesome relationship. we communicate well, we are friends, partners, lovers; we just work well together. We have never really had a real argument. well at least not one that has made me react or not even make me want to look at him. He has never really hurt me to the point where I wanted to leave and had no thought behind it until recently. He said to me the other day 'I hope that you can be happy again and my response was I just hope that you could be Happy." Lets not forget that the goal first is, self. Thing is I am happy period and he is my perk, my greatest perk and although I was hurt, I was not unhappy; I am not unhappy. All I could think of was the way he makes me feel and that we are all human and that I wish he was Happy; I wish he knew what my heart feels like and how much more of a good emotion is in it because of him, but again he is my perk. I remember once, he said I am happy and I could feel his smile through the phone, he said it without a thought; it was beautiful, my entire heart lit up. I love that man so. In the beginning of this I said, "In anything you strive to reach there is work but once you have gotten there you just have to make sure you can stay there." It seems and I have learned, that we allow people, situations, emotions and money dictate our happy. How we feel about our self because lets face it, happy is all about self love. If you are always smiling with yourself then nothing else can really come through and break that; no matter how good or bad. So what do we do?? Who ever really knows and I truly don't have an answer for that other than to search for your happy. How you do it? I have no idea but if we all would make ourselves priority first then you can add people, situations or whatever into the equation. We have to always know that we are the prize and everything else is a perk. I can say I have lost myself, my happy in people plenty of times and I almost lost myself in the man. I didn't want to lose sight of me, I just wanted to have sight of us. A relationship is the easiest was anyone can lose any and everything, I became selfless at one point and in turn it allowed him to be selfish, that is when I realized I almost lost my happy. We have to realize that relationships are about two people everything matters on both ends. Easier said than done but teams of two work well with both teammates work together and work with one another, not one or the other. Happy is love; love yourself and then you can learn to love someone else... everything else is the added perk.; Don't need it, want it. Never forget yourself and just be happy.
Friday, January 11, 2013
More than beauty...
It is better than beautiful...
Love is like seeing God without Site...
That rhythm that flows through your legs just before you climax...
That feel so good all you can do is cry but that's not even enough
Ha!
Love is like that I feel u touching my heart 10 feet away and although its a saying..
It’s as real as can be; u touched me
Love is all your hearts desires and then some
Unexplained unimaginable irresistible feeling u have no control over..
Sometimes I fight love...
but I've learned to embrace love...
Let go and let's live in love...
I’m Love!
2-13-12
2-13-12
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